Well, I've learned that taking accountability is a difficult thing to do. Most of the time, you can't even see your own contribution to messy situations. Even when you do finally "see the light," you then have to deal with pride. Admitting fault is hard to do. It makes you vulnerable! I decided to take the leap, and to accept the landing, regardless of how clumsy or painful it might be. The result was less than elegant, but I am so glad I did it. I now have a solid foundation to start from. And the start will be repairing myself...working on my own self-worth, self-efficacy, and self-love. I can only control myself, so I may as well begin.
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